The Queen of Hearts and The King of Diamonds
by fission07
Summary: After Hermione is humiliated, Ginny convinces her to get on with her life - starting with attending her and Harry's engagement party - by giving her the following advice: Wear something sexy.
1. Chapter 1

"But… you're still coming to the party, yeah?"

Hermione sighed and rubbed her forehead, moving the phone to her other hand to hold it in her neck.

"I don't know, Gin…" she said, while adding parmesan cheese to her mushroom risotto on the stove.

"Hermione, just because my brother is a cheating, lying bastard doesn't mean you can't continue on with your life."

Hermione smirked at Ginny's blunt insult as she shook the risotto onto a plate and turned the stove off.

"Besides," the redhead continued. "And do keep in mind, I'm not trying to blame you for anything, but, weren't you having doubts about your relationship anyway?"

"Yes, bu-"

"Exactly! So stop hiding from the world and come to the engagement party! You've done nothing wrong, and we love you."

"You just love my baking."

"While that may also be true, you know this is about you."

Hermione walked her plate over to the small kitchen table before responding.

"Fine."

"YES! Hermione, darling, thank you so much. You don't know how happy you've just  
made me! Oh, er- and Harry of course."

Hermione gave her a small chuckle and took a bite of mushroom before interjecting, "The _second_ something bad happens, I'm leaving."

"'Mi…"

"Gin, Ronald is the biggest hothead on the planet, you know it's true," Hermione replied, jabbing her fork into the space in front of her. "I just don't want to have to hex a member of your family into oblivion on your special day."

It was Ginny's turn to laugh and reply with a begrudging, "Oh, alright."

"Great. So, cake?"

"Chocolate and raspberry?!"

"Of course."

"Ooh, yum. Okay, tomorrow, 7 p.m. sharp!"

"I'll get there early, around 6."

"Good. Oh, and wear something sexy."

"Why?"

"Just do it!"

"Ugh. The things I do for you... Bye, Gin."

"Bye!"

Hermione set the phone down on the mahogany table with a soft thud, now semi-regretting the decision to convince all her friends to get ones as well – it made it too easy for them to contact her. Sighing, she leaned into her chair and closed her eyes, letting her head fall back. It had been 3 weeks since she caught her boyfriend – now _ex_-boyfriend – of 4 years, Ronald Weasley, in bed with none other than Pansy Parkinson. She could vividly recall the crazed shrieks and disgustingly sloppy noises coming from their – now _his_ – bedroom as she returned home late from her job as a senior curator for the British Museum of Magical History, specializing in Magical Artefacts and Beings.

She could clearly remember the look on Ron's stupid face as she opened the door and leaned on the doorframe, constructing a mask of nonchalance she didn't know she had the ability to maintain whilst absolutely _seething_ on the inside.

She saw his eyes grow wide with shock as Pansy continued to ride him like the _whore_ she was, oblivious to the new body in the room.

She heard him swear and push the dark-haired girl off of him as he yelled things like "I'm sorry", "Don't leave", "It's not what you think".

She felt him grab her arm as she made towards the floo; first, begging her to stay with him, and, after refusing, blaming _her_ for his infidelity.

"_You don't treat me like a King like other girls do. I'm the bloody captain of the Chudley Cannons now - I deserve better! You're lucky I love you as much as I do. So you see, it's not really my fault – it's yours. But now you know, so just try harder and we'll make it wor-"_

That was the last thing he said to her before she punched him square in the jaw and ran out.

Hermione's eyes flashed open and she realized she'd been sitting, thinking, for over half an hour. A tear ran down her cheek, and she lifted a finger to wipe it away.

What shocked Hermione the most about the whole ordeal was that she wasn't sad that they were over – no, she had thought about leaving him countless times before. But while what transpired was infuriating, awful and downright _humiliating_, the thing she was _most_ sad about was the thought of being someone incapable of being loved.

Sure, she wasn't the most beautiful witch; her dark brown hair was average, her brown eyes – plain, her curvy body – very un-English, but she didn't think she was _so_ bad.

No, she wasn't submissive and obedient like some witches were; she was tenacious, stubborn, argumentative and had a fiery temper to boot, but she liked to think it was… endearing.

Obviously, she wasn't a dunce – hell, she was the brightest witch of her age! But she hoped that there were _some_ that weren't so intimidated by that.

Hermione found her thoughts were heading towards a downward spiral, which was _not_ what she needed right now, so, before she could make herself feel any worse, she went to get her new book, _Magical Earthenware of the Medieval Era_, and finished her dinner.

* * *

Later that evening, after adding the last of the chocolate ganache and raspberry coulis to Ginny's desired flourless chocolate cake, Hermione went upstairs to her room. While she wasn't the type to normally fret about her appearance, she knew that tomorrow was important; not only for her two best friends, but for herself as well.

It would be the first time she faced the Weasley family, aside from Ginny, since the incident, and the only frame of reference Ginny gave her as to what she should wear was "something sexy". _How utterly unhelpful…_

As ruffled through her closet, looking for something - _anything_, she became increasingly frustrated. She wasn't completely incompetent when it came to fashion, but this was different; and there was only one person she could turn to.

A few seconds later she stuck her head through the floo.

"Blaise?"

"Who's the- Hermione? What's wrong?"

Blaise Zabini was a fellow curator at the museum, specializing in Historical Magical Attire and Cultures. The Zabinis had remained entirely neutral during the time of You-Know-Who, and since The Fall, Blaise and Hermione had become very good friends. On top of that, because of his Italian heritage and maddening success when it came to romance, there was no one she trusted more when it came to good taste in fashion or the art of seduction.

"Help me!"

An hour later, they were finally successful.

"Give them hell, tomorrow, _cara mia_, and floo me a picture of Weasley's mingin' face when he realizes just what he lost, alright?"

Giving her a peck on the cheek, he disapparated.

Finally feeling prepared for whatever the next day would bring, Hermione went to sleep, a smug smile on her face.


	2. Chapter 2

_DING-dong…_

Hermione stood on Harry's doorstep at Godric's Hollow gift and cake in hand. Like a broken record, Ginny's enigmatic words from the night before – _Wear something sexy – _were on repeat in the back of her mind. Seeing as tonight's engagement party was meant to include only family and a few people from the Order, she didn't understand exactly _whom_ she was to impress.

_I wonder who the mystery man will be tonight_, she snorted, _Hagrid? Percy? Oooh, maybe Severus!_ Grinning, she was pulled from the ridiculous image of Severus Snape flirting when she heard the distant thundering of footsteps. A few moments later, an out of breath Harry appeared at the door, wearing only his boxers, attempting to pull his head through the sleeve of his t-shirt.

"'Mione, I'm so sorry, Gin and I were jus-"

"Ohhh, Harry, I don't need to know!" Hermione replied, quickly placing her parcels on the front step so she could tug on his shirt, helping his head find the right hole. She chuckled at the state he was in as he finally managed to get his shirt on properly. When his head popped out, she saw a sheepish grin cross his features before his mouth went slack.

"Hermione! Y-you look…"

She looked incredible. Her normally wavy hair was half up and fell in full, romantic curls, stopping just above her rounded backside. A touch of light make-up made her eyes shimmer and her glossy lips looked luscious. She wore a tight gold dress with a dipping v-neckline that clearly defined her slightly-above-average sized breasts, and womanly curves. The skirt fell mid-thigh, highlighting her sun-kissed skin, and the crimson heels she donned enhanced the shape of her muscles, making her short legs look longer.

"Just… Wow."

She smiled, picking up her parcels and pulled him into a one-armed hug.

"Thank you… and congratulations!"

As he led them into the living room, Ginny came skipping down the stairs in one of Harry's old Quidditch jerseys, hair mussed up and lips swollen – the clear sign of a recent snog.

"Hermione! I'm so sorry, Harry and I were just-"

"_Why_ must you both insist on informing me of _every_ aspect of your lives?" Hermione exclaimed, interrupting before her best friend could talk about _any_ sexual things of, or pertaining to, the boy who was, essentially, her brother.

Ginny laughed and crossed the room to hug her friend before pulling back to take a clearer look at her.

"Blimey, Hermione, when I say sexy, you go all out! Where have you been hiding all this, you little witch!"

"Oh, shut it," Hermione replied, trying – but failing – to conceal her smile, as she walked into the kitchen to set down the dessert. She was making her way back in to the sitting area to deposit the engagement gift when she heard her two friends whispering in the far corner of the room.

"Harry, did you see her? It'll be perfect!"

"I think so too. Bloody hell, Gin, he's going to kill me for not suggesting it sooner."

"What _are_ you two first-years giggling about over there?"

Ginny swivelled around, a gleam in her eye. "Nothing important."

Hermione raised an eyebrow at her friend and replied, "Gin, you might as well just tell me what's going on."

"Never!" the redhead whispered dramatically as she grabbed Harry by the hand, pulling him up the stairs.

"Fine, but you two better be getting ready… No more bedroom fun!" Hermione yelled after them, rolling her eyes as Ginny's light giggles drifted down the staircase.

* * *

Forty-five minutes later, the two re-appeared - Ginny, in a lavish sapphire blue strapless cocktail dress, and Harry in dress trousers and a nice blazer.

"Well, don't you two look dashing!" Hermione exclaimed from the bar as she poured herself another glass of wine.

Ginny winked at her friend before running a hand through her deep, rosewood color waves. Harry flicked his wand, conjuring food on separate tables around the room and bringing a Muggle stereo to life.

Hermione looked at him, an amused smile on her face as he grinned back.

"Muggle music is better."

Hermione chuckled and arranged the various bottles of alcohol on the cabinet while Ginny checked the time. "The family should be here soon."

"Mrs. Weasley would never let the boys be late for something like this," Hermione replied. "It's 6:59. I bet they'll be arriving riiiight about-"

_POP!_

"-Now."

* * *

Hermione sat in the corner of the room, her Cabernet Sauvignon in hand. The Weasley family were the first to arrive with Mr. and Mrs. Weasley bringing in the front, followed by the twins, Charlie, Bill, Fleur and Percy – Ron was nowhere to be seen.

Any annoyance on their part, however, was short-lived, as, within the next few minutes, everyone had arrived and the party was in full swing.

Hermione laughed and mingled but had yet to have any time alone to breathe. It had been enough of a challenge getting through greeting the Weasley family and dealing with their sad, apologetic looks – she didn't want their sympathy. The twins, however, managed to boost her confidence a bit when they informed her that she looked "totally and completely shaggable". This was, of course, before they attempted to coax her into playing devilish pranks on Ron – the worst part being that she almost gave in. Finally, she managed to return to sit in her corner and simply observed.

Kingsley and Minerva were catching up with Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, discussing the new happenings at the Ministry and at Hogwarts. Remus went over to congratulate the newly engaged couple and Severus, as always, was scowling silently in the corner, glaring at the twins, who were currently showing off their latest product, from across the room.

Hermione was about to take another sip of her fourth glass of wine when the most unexpected guest walked through the door.

"Draco - You made it! I was starting to think you wouldn't actually come."

"What faith you have in me. Am I not a loyal enough friend to you, Potter?"

"Yeah, yeah, alright, just stop speaking Gryffindor. You're starting to worry me. I'm just glad you're here."

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, mate. Congratulations. And Ginny, you look lovely. I apologise for being late, there was a bit of an issue back at headquarters, had to make a visit to Muggle London – ergo, my entrance through the door."

"Thank you, Draco, and you need not apologise. It's wonderful to see you! Harry, why don't you take Draco to get something to drink."

Hermione was eyeing the entire transaction over the rim of her glass. Yes, she knew that Harry and Draco were partners at the ministry in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, but she didn't know they had gotten that close! Then again, she realised that with all the work and drama piling up over the past few months, she'd never really had the chance to ask.

Hopping up from her seat, she waited until the two men walked to the bar to grab Ginny by the arm and pull her away from the crowd.

"Ginny! You said this was going to be a FAMILY event!"

Ginny grinned and whispered back, "Yes, well, I suppose I forgot didn't I."

Hermione's eyes grew wide as realisation dawned on her.

"Bu- but… What! Him?! Me? No. He would never- I mean… Not that I… Er…"

"Just give him a chance, 'Mi," Ginny implored. "We're not at Hogwarts anymore. Things have changed. Talk to him, you'll see."

Feeling incredibly anxious, Hermione nodded and went to retrieve her glass, deep in thought.

Yes, it was true that Draco turned spy for the Order before the Battle of Hogwarts, which meant that he had to have known the difference between right and wrong and that he wasn't a total arse. But even so, at that point, he had never really warmed up to any of them, and after they graduated, Hermione hardly ever saw him. _There must be _something_ Harry sees in him… Well, more than he already saw before._

Remembering when he walked in a couple minutes ago, she couldn't help but think of how handsome he had become over the years. _That added with the fact that he's much less of a prat… Draco Malfoy might actually be quite decent! Gods, I must be drunk._ She laughed a little at herself before downing her entire drink in one go.

"Eager, are we, Granger?"

She jumped at the familiar smooth, baritone voice, whipping her body around only to be met with the beautiful face of Draco Malfoy.

"Malfoy!" she squeaked. "How are… I didn't know you were coming."

Draco chuckled and smiled down at her through his fine, platinum blonde hair.

"You look stunning."

Hermione blushed under the intensity of his gaze. "Thank you... You don't look so bad yourself."

Draco chuckled again, and this time, she couldn't help but smile a little. After a few moments of silent contemplation, Draco decided to speak.

"It's great about Harry and Ginny, isn't it?"

"Yeah, fantastic," Hermione replied. "They've been in love since Hogwarts days – 'twas only a matter of time until this happened, I suppose. I'm just happy to be a part of it."

"I know what you mean," he added, a thoughtful expression on his face. "He's a good friend."

Hermione looked up at him, tilting her head to one side, as he took a sip of his firewhiskey sour. When he made eye contact with her over the rim of the glass, he lowered it slowly, watching her eyeing him as he licked his lips. Her gaze shot back up to his Arctic grey eyes in time to see him raise a perfect blonde eyebrow in mirth and she noticed a fluttery sensation in her stomach that she'd never felt before.

"You're just…" she started, thinking of the right words to pick. "You're different… Then again, it has been a while… You seem to have changed."

"In a favourable way, I hope," he replied, his eyes sparkling.

"Yes, well, we shall see," she replied, her confidence returning, before she gave him a sly smile and walked towards the open bar to get herself another drink.

Draco followed close behind her and, when she leaned against the edge of the counter to get a better look, she felt his hand on her lower back.

"I hope you're not back for another glass of wine," he said, amusement in his voice.

"And so what if I am?" she replied, turning around so their bodies were close, but not touching.

"I would ask you to trust me to make you something a little more…" he paused, leaning forward ever so slightly. "…_Exciting._"

Hermione shivered as his cool, minty breath brushed against her ear. "Are you trying to get me drunk, Mr. Malfoy?"

He gave her a sly grin. "A gentleman would never take advantage of a lady, Ms. Granger."

"You are hardly a gentleman," she replied, a mocking smile on her face.

"As you are hardly a lady," he retorted, his signature Malfoy smirk in place.

Hermione cocked an eyebrow as she leaned closer to his face, their noses just brushing, only to pull away at the last minute as she reached next to her for a cylindrical glass.

"Now, about that drink?"

Draco was more than a little surprised at the sight of her smirk as she straightened up, beautiful breasts out, and pushed the glass towards him. He had to clear his throat a little before he could find his voice again. _Damn, she's changed! Those eyes… That smile… That body… Harry was right. Has she always been this… fiery?_

"Of course. Now, Hermione, do you trust me?"

Hermione looked in to his eyes, her brow crinkled, before she answered, with a rewarding smile, "Yes."

She had never seen him so… normal; it was really quite refreshing, and she was surprised at just how much she enjoyed his company. When he had finally finished, he took her hand and brought them back to their seats in the corner of the house.

"So, why _are_ you here?" she asked as he levitated over another seat to sit on.

"Well," he started. "As I'm sure you know, Potter and I have been partners at the-"

"The Department of Magical Law Enforcement, yes."

Draco smiled. "Always the know-it-all, eh, Granger?"

She rolled her eyes at him, acknowledging his joking manner before saying, "Sorry. Go on."

"It was hard at first; we were both at each other's throats all the time – you know, old grudges from Hogwarts days," eyeing Hermione as she nodded understandingly. "Then one day, we had a big case – I'm afraid I can't tell you the details, ministry policy and all – but things changed when I… Well… " Draco hesitated.

"When what?"

"When he saved my life," another voice interrupted.

Hermione looked up in surprise and met Harry's eyes.

"Draco saved your life?"

Harry nodded. "It was in that moment that I knew I could trust him. From then on, we were, without a doubt, the strongest team on the force. Without him, I wouldn't have what I have today."

"Stop it, Harry, you're making me blush," Draco joked as he and his friend shared a grin.

"I had no idea," Hermione breathed as she looked at the two men in front of her.

"We don't talk about it much," Draco replied, a slight blush creeping to his cheeks as he looked at the admiration clear in her eyes.

Harry's grin widened as he noticed the subtle interaction between the two. Clearing his throat, he said, "Truth be told, Draco, the main reason why I came over here wasn't to eavesdrop. It was actually to ask you – only if you wanted to, that is – to be my best man at the wedding."

"Me? What about Weasley?" Draco asked, his eyes flicking briefly in Hermione's direction.

"I could ask him, but I'm asking you."

Draco stood and clapped a hand on Harry's shoulder before pulling him into a brief hug.

"I would be honoured."

Harry nodded approvingly and, with one last smile at the pair, he returned to his fiancée.

"So… speaking of Weasley," Draco said, sitting down again. "Where is he tonight? I mean, it is his sister's engagement party."

"I haven't the foggiest," Hermione replied, a sour look on her face. "He's a right prat, though, for missing this."

"From what Potter tells me about him, he's been a prat his whole life," Draco muttered. "And yet, you two remained friends with him…. Odd."

Hermione chuckled lightly. "Things have changed. Trust me, Draco, when I say I'm quite glad he's not her-"

_POP!_

_Bugger…_

Over an hour late and _reeking_ of alcohol, Ronald Weasley made it a point of order to make a grandiose entrance with none other than Pansy Parkinson on his arm. He noticed Hermione sitting away from the others and everyone remained silent as he smugly made his way over to her. When he finally saw her in full view, his expression turned to shock and his face began to turn red – she had never dressed like that when she was with _him_! However, not wanting to lose face, he attempting to conceal his frustration.

"Hermione, you remember Pansy?"

"RON, what the hell is your bloody proble-"

"It's okay, Gin," Hermione said, stopping her friend mid-rant. Standing up to the pair, she smiled. "Hello, Pansy, so nice to see you again."

Pansy looked surprised for a moment before she leaned over to lick Ron's ear. Turning her pug-face back to Hermione, she replied, "I wish I could say the sa- well, no I don't."

Ignoring the venomous stares and emerging wand ends from the rest of the people in the room, she went on. "I must say, I wasn't at _all_surprised when Ronald finally decided to find a _real_ woman. Shame about you though. How many nights have you spent crying about it, hmm?"

Hermione continued to smile at the girl, looking her up and down before finally, she sighed, and started laughing. Her laughter reached a booming level, garnering worried looks from her friends, before she regained control of herself.

"Oh, Pansy. You better hope you marry rich; after all, it seems the smartest thing to ever come out of your mouth was a penis."

Ginny, Harry and the twins didn't even bother trying to conceal their laughter as Pansy's face contorted with rage, and, although she couldn't see it, Draco was smirking approvingly behind her. _Saucy vixen…_

"Now, tell me," Hermione continued. "Exactly how many men had to knock you against their headboards for you to become _this_ stupid?"

"I don't need to deal with this from you, you mudblood bitch!" Pansy shrieked as she pushed Ron off of her and ran out the door.

"Leaving so soon? I was just about to poison the tea!" Ginny yelled after her, laughing when she heard another squeal of outrage.

Ron quickly turned on his heel and ran after the girl, leaving in his wake a trail of fury and embarrassment.

"Well," Ginny said. "At least that slag left quickly. I don't think I could've held off from sending a Bat-Bogey hex her way for much longer."

Hermione remained standing, breathing heavily as her eyes drifted to her left forearm where the scarred word '_mudblood'_ was carved into her skin, hidden by a glamour charm.

"Hermione?" Draco asked, a worried look on his face. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. I'm fine." she replied, through a clenched jaw.

Draco, from his seated position, took her hand in his and attempted to calm her down when Ron charged back in the house and made his way over to her – again.

Draco quickly stood and whispered in her ear, "You don't have to speak with him if you don't want to. We can go somewhere else, we can leave-"

"_Hermione."_

Hermione held Draco's hand behind her back and smiled. "Hello, Ronald. Where is dear Pansy? I'd hate for her to miss dessert."

Ron scowled at her, angry both at the embarrassment Pansy had caused him and the sight of how good Hermione looked without him.

"Pathetic, aren't we? Here at a party, alone, with no _real_ family. How does it feel to always be the outsider, Hermione?

Ginny gave Harry a warning look as she started to stride over to where the confrontation was happening.

"I'm not alone. You just happened to interrupt a conversation I was having, here, with Draco. Now, if you would kindly leave, we would greatly appreciate it."

Ron's attention suddenly turned to Draco, who, apparently, until now, he had not noticed at all.

"_Malfoy?_ What the bloody hell are you doing here?!" Ron yelled, his voice rising.

Draco's face remained impassive as he replied, "I was invited, Weasley."

"By WHO?!"

"By me."

Ron whirled around at the sound of Harry's stern voice, a shocked expression on his face.

"You invited a _Death Eater_ to your engagement party? What the FUCK is wrong with you!"

"He's not, and never has been, a convicted Death Eater, Ron, and there is nothing wrong with me. If you had taken a second out of your double-life to ask me about mine, you would have already known that Draco and I became friends after working together, as partners, for the past 2 years," he paused to let his words sink in before continuing. "And the fact of the matter is, Death Eater or not, he isn't the one ruining this evening for us – you are."

Ron turned back around to face Draco, who was now standing slightly in front of Hermione, protectively.

Ron sneered as he caught sight of the action and said, "Oh, now you too? Moving on with _Malfoy_, are we? Don't hate Mudbloods as much as you used to, then, huh? I guess Slytherins will really take _anything_, won't they, even used up, Mudblood filth!"

The crowd gasped as Hermione's eyes hardened in a way that Draco hadn't seen for years; back when she used to look at _him_ like that.

Draco was about to pull out his wand when Hermione stopped him.

The room was deathly silent as she continued to glare at Ron with a fire that should have him burnt to a crisp by now. While Hermione stepped around Draco and stalked towards her ex-boyfriend, it was as if time had stopped. Everyone in the room was holding their breath as they waited to see what the most powerful witch of their age would do.

With one last step, she closed the space between herself and Ron, and, in a voice that she didn't know belonged to her, she hissed, "I don't care how drunk you are right now. If you _ever_ talk to me, or anyone I care about, like that again… you will be sorry."

Eyes still burning, she took one step back, lifting her hand to summon her purse using wandless magic.

"…Bitch."

At that, Hermione spun around, arm extended, and, with the fastest wand movements Draco had ever seen, had Ron paralysed, muted, covered in boils and hanging upside down within seconds before she gave her friends an apologetic look, turned on the spot and Apparated away.


End file.
